A most grand morning to you, all my readers. Of course, while you might be waking up presently, your industrious Codger has been busy all morning—the whole morning. When I woke up, I realized that I needed to get to go to the store to buy some cold cereal. But because I, like most media figureheads, could easily be recognized by members of the general public (especially ones who read this “lifestyle column”), I thought it best to wear a disguise.
I routed through the missus’ drawers to see if she had any extra wigs lying around, but she didn’t, probably because she doesn’t wear a wig. So I had to go with a hat instead. But which hat? My Panama hat. Definitely my Panama hat. No one would suspect a Panamanian denizen of being a prominent US media pundit. I also wore my blue jacket, the one I never wear because I don’t like it very much. There aren’t many people around here who have seen me wearing that jacket in public.
My disguise worked: Not a single person accosted me by requesting an autograph or criticizing my stance on any issues in the news on which I have an opinion. Then I took my cold cereal home. Basic Four is the one I bought, because it includes all four food groups: Meat, fruits, vegetables, and dairy. To get at the precious bounty inside, I filleted the box like a soft shelled crab…you just slice it up the middle. I’ve found over the years that that’s the best way to do it. Media hotshots like myself tend to refer to ourselves as “early adapters” when we do things like that which other people don’t.
Ahoy there, readers. And a special “ahoy” to my grandson Max. His photography article yesterday was really something, wasn’t it? I really felt the thrill of traveling cross-country by looking at his photos. He has such a creative spirit. You know, if Max weren’t already a glassblowing artisan, he could always make a living as a photographer for a museum. Any museum would be proud to hang his photos up on the wall.
Now on to the next order of business: Today is as good a time as any to talk about my latest appointee to the list of Exemplary Codgers: Donatella Versace. The Wikipedia encyclopedia documents her age as 55, which at first I thought was a typographical error. But then I remembered that Donatella is European, and they can retire earlier over there because the government supports its senior citizens, in effect encouraging people to strive for seniority. It’s not like it is over here, with everyone preoccupied with staying young by getting plastic surgery. No, Donatella Versace is proud to let herself age naturally and is not ashamed of her mature physique, frequently flaunting it in the media:
A photo of Donatella Versace you can see at The Inquisitr
Using the YouTube video search engine, I found this fascinating video footage of Donatella being interviewed by former Supreme Court nominee Harriet Mays Powell. It’s good to know that Harriet Mays Powell landed on her feet after that nomination fiasco: New York Magazine was generous to offer her a position as its Fashion Director. How many other places would even consider hiring a Supreme Court non-starter? Not many, I’ll tell you that much. Maybe a dry cleaner or a newsstand might take her on as an apprentice, but that’s about it.
As you can see, Donatella Versace has dedicated her life to charity by encouraging the younger generation to become creative. She lets them draw and paint different types of fashions that she then sells right there in her store. The children hold full creative control (this is the complete opposite of the Kathie Lee Sweatshop); did you see the gold leather suit and that dress with zippers all over it that those kids came up with? This kind of creativity can only come from the mind of a child. And Donatella was kind enough to transform their ideas into reality. Donatella Versace, The Codger salutes you.
A most grand morning to you, all my readers. Of course, while you might be waking up presently, your industrious Codger has been busy all morning—the whole morning. When I woke up, I realized that I needed to get to go to the store to buy some cold cereal. But because I, like most media figureheads, could easily be recognized by members of the general public (especially ones who read this “lifestyle column”), I thought it best to wear a disguise.
From the desk of The Codger 