Posts Tagged ‘hallowe’en’

Ghost Writing for Halloween

A jolly good morning to you, ladies and germs! I am most pleased to have such an attentive audience this morning. You are attentive, right? You’d better be. You’re not going to get anywhere in life with a poor attitude. That’s the real world. That’s how it is. You should be more like my grandson M-Fixie, who is, to put it simply, awesome.

I remember when every commercial used to have a Moby song in it. There were more Moby songs in commercials than you could shake a stick at, young’n. Those were the good old days back in ’99. Well happy days are here again, because they made another one, and it’s a doozey! It even has Moby Dick in it! Makes me want to get up and dance the Charleston. I will have to consider the purchase of the AT&T BlackBerry Torch.

It’s Halloween today. I know my neighborhood and the names of the people that live in, so I made a checklist of all the children and check them off when they come trick or treating at my house. I’m not going to waste my hard earned money on carpetbaggers who come in from the next town over to get their hands on our sweets. And if I see anybody vandalizing my house, I’m not afraid to do a little kung fu citizens arrest on them.

Until next time!


The Codger*

*(today’s lifestyle column was ghost written by m-fixie. Peace out)


My Grandson Max Will Be “Ghost Writing” For Me Tomorrow

Greetings, dear readers. I have some spooky news to share with you on this All Hallows’ Eve eve. I have asked my grandson Max (who I am sure you all remember by his Internet “handle”, M-Fixie, because he is a fixed-gear bicycle enthusiast) to “ghost write” tomorrow’s Hallowe’en column for me. Spooky, no? But don’t let the ghostly happenings frighten you too much: Remember that I am not really a ghost, and that it is just Max writing as if he is writing for me after I have passed.

 Oh my…I had intended to write more exhaustively today, but my Welsh corgi, Hannah Montana, is barking at the door. Usually when she does that, she has to go do her business, although sometimes she only wants to fraternize with a squirrel or somesuch. But I don’t intend on taking any chances. I don’t feel like spending the rest of the day cleaning up after she has an accident, and I do not intend on giving out my home address over the Internet for any of you to come and help me clean up.

Until next time!


The Codger