Advice on Sending a Card

Ole’ to you all, my dear readers. That’s how all the locals say “hello” in the countries where they speak Spanish, and believe me, there are several. I just got off the phone with my old pal Bill. We don’t get to see each other much these days since he doesn’t like to take the car on the highway anymore, and if you stick to the back roads, it takes over ten hours for him to get here. But he does just fine around town, though. Well, Billy called this morning to tell me that he had heard from his neighbor that the borough treasurer has taken ill, and he wanted to know if I had heard anything.

Back when Billy and I were in school together, that borough treasurer had been our class president. Howard was his name. I’m not sure why he made the transition from the executive to the financial branch of government, but that’s exactly what he did. I asked Billy what was wrong with him and he said he didn’t know, and that’s why he was calling me. I told him that I haven’t lived in town for over fifty years, so I wasn’t privy to the gossip the way he still is. Billy said that the last time he had seen Howard was during the last campaign, and he had seemed healthy as a horse then, going around kissing babies and widows and whatnot.

Billy gave me the address of borough hall so I can send a get well card, just to be on the safe side. That’s what you do when you’re not sure if someone is ailing: You send them a card, but you have to make sure it’s one of the ones that’s completely blank on the inside and doesn’t say anything like “get well soon” on the outside. Something with a picture is nice, like a picture of a sun or a porpoise…something neutral. You get the idea.

Until next time!

Ahoy,

The Codger

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4 responses to this post.

  1. My dear Codger,

    With all due respect, porpoises are by no means neutral. All the porpoises I’ve met do nothing but squeak out their high-pitched opinions. Also, they have no tolerance for the question, “What’s the difference between porpoises and dolphins?” They’re like the Jude Law of mammals: they just think they’re better than everyone else.

    I do hope your friend is well. Happy Monday to you!

    Maura

    Reply

    • Hello to you Miss Maura. How nice to hear from you. I hadn’t thought of porpoises in that light before, but judging by what you say, perhaps I am due to reconsider. After all, I have gotten most of my information about the species from watching the Flipper television program. I seem to remember an episode where Flipper battled another porpoise named Tough Guy who had a bad attitude. Perhaps that’s the type of porpoise you’re thinking of, the kind that gives other porpoises a bad name.

      Best to you and yours,
      The Codger

      Reply

  2. Hello! I’ve been following your blog since Todd Pack mentioned you in the Versatile Blogger award. Love your opinions and handy tips for things like Get Well cards (will keep it in mind). Very entertaining, and haven’t missed a post yet!

    Reply

    • Hello to you, TheFriande. It’s nice to hear that you’ve been enjoying my helpful hints to live a better lifestyle. Maybe if more people had better lifestyles, more things would get done on time and on budget. Keep fighting the good fight.

      All the best,
      The Codger

      Reply

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