Good morning, my grand gaggle of geese. I hope this article finds you well. Today I would like to use this platform to talk to you a bit about corporate responsibility. Basically, corporations aren’t responsible as they used to be. Back then, we had companies you could look up to, like White-Westinghouse, Borax, and the Studebaker-Packard Corporation (though once they dropped the “Packard” from the name, you don’t need me to tell you how quickly they went bust). Back when I was an eager young businessman, I learned the right way to do things. We didn’t need pie charts and training seminars to teach us how to do everything. No, we learned it on the job, because if we didn’t, we’d be out of there in no time.
As a matter of fact, my contributions led directly to an intricate organizational system whereby all important corporate documents were placed into alpha-numeric boxes. And when we boxed up those documents, it was quite the celebration, since it freed up the back room for office parties, where we held the celebration. There was cake and ice cream. The works. Like the kids like to say, it was the “bomb”.
Then the Regional Vice President came to our office to check on our progress. Mr. Waxman was his name, but everybody called him The Wolfman because he looked like a wolf. Well The Wolfman was so impressed with the box system that he immediately proclaimed it Boxing Day. It took a few years for it to filter over to the companies that make calendars, but they liked the idea so much that they started putting it on all their calendars to spread the word, in the process turning it into the national holiday it is today. You don’t see things like that at companies today. It’s what they used to call “synergistic energy”. Today they just reduce it to “synergy” and leave it at that.
Until next time!