From the News Desk of The Codger


Good morning, my grand group of guppies! Welcome back to our daily round table discussion.

UPDATE: I am pleased to report that my dispute with the common-law Mrs. Codger yesterday was a simple misunderstanding. Watching Marilyn McCoo and Billy Davis, Jr.’s counseling video together solved all our problems. Afterwards, we laughed and laughed about the childishness of our dispute, particularly my baseless accusations. We then spent a few hours watching videos of Marilyn and Billy singing on YouTube, including our favorite, “You Don’t Have To Be a Star (To Be In My Show)”: The whole time we were laughing and having a wonderful time enjoying each other’s company. Our common-law marriage remains as strong as ever.

NEWSFLASH: The oil spill in the Gulf continues unabated. I’ve heard word (unconfirmed) that British Petroleum is considering a “junk shot”: A shot of junk into the opening of the pipe to clog it up. I’m no engineering expert, but to me, this sounds like a waste of junk that could have, ideally, been recycled.

NEWSFLASH II: I’ve identified a new trend in my neighborhood. I was sitting in my kitchen last night when I heard two loud cars drive down my street, one right after the other. I went out on my porch, and sure enough, two different cars drove by again a few minutes later. They were drag racing down my street, just like the kids used to do when I was their age. What you do is you take an old car, soup up the engine, take out all the unnecessary weight, and that’s how you make a racer. You have to be crafty and use whatever resources are at your disposal. To think that I am lucky enough to be treated to this free display of culture right from my front porch! It almost reminds me of the way people in Mexico gather to watch the matador battle the picador at the big bullfights down there.

Until next time!

Ahoy,

The Codger

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One response to this post.

  1. The principle behind the “junk shot”, as I understand it, is similar to that of dropping large amounts of sand onto the leak. It *would* stop it, but isn’t feasible at that depth. The rubbish would have a similar effect as dropping sand, but is more likely to stick together and block the leak.

    Whether it stands a decent chance of working, and any long term effects, I do not know…

    Reply

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