The Codger’s Guide To Renos


Ah, what a glorious day. Thanks for taking time out of your work-day or welfare life to join our little Codgery coterie. As the Home and Garden TV network reminds us every day, the single most important duty of homeowners is to perform what are known as “renos” (pronounciation key: rennos, from the abbreviation for “renovations”). These “renos” can be performed in any room of the house, be it kitchen, bathroom, parlor, sitting parlor, solarium, bedroom, but most frequently kitchen. A key feature of any successful reno must be the upgrades: laminated floors, neutral paints, stainless steel appliances, or, most importantly, the “on suite”: a coveted subset of “bonus room” usually filled with bath fixtures or a walk-in closet/pantry/butler’s pantry. Good homeowners are in a perpetual state of reno-ing, because even if they’re not selling, they’re increasing the appraised value of their primary investment. The way I see it (correctly), if you’re not reno-ing, you might as well be letting your ripe home wither on the vine.

By reno-ing, I know that I’m putting the funds I get from my government-insured reverse mortgage to their best possible use. I spent all yesterday afternoon tackling a big project in my kitchen. While I had every intention of installing an island and resurfacing the floor, time got the better of me and I did not get that far. Fortunately, my kitchen reno still managed to change the whole feel of the place, as I applied three coats of matte eggshell to create a stunning “accent wall”.

I also wanted to mention a new TV advertisement that appeals to both my senior citizen demographic and younger folks. It’s for the Toyota Avalon. I knew something good would come out of that recall. The nice young people in this ad do a wonderful job of instructing young people today how to speak and behave. And the whole storyline about going to the city perfectly matches the attitudes of young people like my grandson Max, who moved there. In this era where there are so many absentee parents, it’s nice to know that sometimes, TV is still there to step up to the plate.

Until next time!

Ahoy,

The Codger

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