The Codger Goes Green

Why, hello again. Welcome back to my new “lifestyle column”. Since I reached retirement age a few years ago, I’ve picked up all kinds of hobbies to keep my life active. I play online Sudoku. I consult with Weather Bug to see the day’s forecast. I walk my Welsh corgi, Hannah Montana, around the neighborhood (FYI, my granddaughter picked the name…I’m not a perv, if that’s what you were thinking). I used to ride a stationary bicycle, but now I just eat a few cups of Activia every day (Hey, if it keeps Jamie Lee Curtis looking so svelte, it works for me!).

But of all my activities, I feel that my work as an amateur environmentalist gives me the most fulfillment. Ever since I read Rachel Carson’s landmark book, Silent Spring, last year, I’ve cut my use of DDT by at least –at least—half. How many people can say that? I’ve also made the switch to Kashi brand cereal. But as we all know, the single most important thing we can do to “go green” is recycling. Today, I’m going to tell you about an easy recycling project that will make a big difference.

My backyard is literally littered with thousands of disgusting pinecones that fall off the pine trees every year. Most people would see two options: Either throw them out in the trash, or let them rot there in the yard, causing who-knows-what kind of environmental contamination. But like the 3rd arrow on the recycling symbol, there is a 3rd option: Recycling. Just take your pinecones, coat them with peanut butter, roll them in birdseed, and hang them from said pine trees. The birds will thank you. If you don’t have any pinecones of your own, try recycling something else by coating it with peanut butter and birdseed. Be creative, there are no wrong answers. Why not try an old tire, or an egg, or the peanut butter jar itself? Somehow, that last one seems especially appropriate.

Oh, before I forget, this week I gleaned from my grandniece when chatting online that instead of asking “what?”, cool people like her ask, “WTF?”. At first I had no idea what she meant, but I caught on quickly based on the context in which she used it. Anything to save a letter when typing, I suppose! So, dear, readers, I’ll try my newfound lingo out on you: WTF have you done for the environment? WTF do you do to teach environmentalism to the younger generations? HTF do you dispose of your used batteries? Share your stories in the comments box!

Until next time!


The Codger


One response to this post.

  1. […] I gave quite possibly the best green advice I ever gave, telling you all you need to know to “go green”: […]


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